A Pain in the Whatchamacallit
By Tiny Ruisch
April is here again. I won’t make the same mistake I did last year when I wrote an April Fools column about leaving Lake Charles. I sure got a lot of questions about why I was moving. I’ve always been an April Fooler type of person. It all started several years ago when I was almost born on April 1.
In this modern age, April 1 pranks almost beg to be played on someones computer. Almost every one uses a laser mouse these days. They can be easily disabled with a small piece of tape or a post it note on the sensor. Many people won’t notice and will have a hard time figuring out why all of a sudden their mouse isn’t working. You can confuse them even more by opening mouse properties in the control panel. Change the mouse speed to the slowest setting will make any mouse activities an ordeal.
Another prank that has been around forever can still confuse even a veteran computer user. Simply take a screen shot of your victim’s computer. Then hide all of the desktop icons and replace their wallpaper with the screen shot. Sit back and watch them click on icons that won’t load a program.
Another quick prank is to open Google’s home page in a browser. Click on preferences and change the default language. You’d be surprised at how many people this trick will fool.
All of the following pranks in this article have been tested on Windows computers. I haven’t done any research to see if they will work on Apple’s Operating System(s). It shouldn’t be to hard to find out if you’re interested.
Many users don’t know about sticky keys. Sticky keys will change how the Ctrl, Alt, Shift and Windows Key will function. When enabled, keys are serialized instead of operating together. For instance, instead of typing “Shift – a” to capitalize, you would have to type “Shift”, release the key and then type “a”. This key change will drive an unsuspecting victim crazy. Sticky keys are enabled easily by pressing the “Shift” key five times in quick succession.
An evil prank that you should only play on someone that won’t beat you up is to cause their computer to shut down. Right click on one of the icons on your victims desk top. Type the following in the target box: %windir%\System32\shutdown.exe -s -f -t 100 -c “Your Message Here”. “Your Message Here” can be replaced with whatever message you like. I use something like “That does not compute so I am shutting down” or “I’m sleepy. I think I’ll shut down and rest now.”
Whenever your victim double clicks on that shortcut, their program will not start. Instead, your message will display for 100 seconds (unless you change the number in the target box.) Then the computer will shut down.
These computer pranks are all designed for the Windows operating system. Although they are non-destructive, you run the risk of aggravating the user and making him or her possibly want to harm you. Use them at your own risk.
Here is one last little April Fools that is easy to implement. Surprisingly, even though it has been around for a long time, a lot of people don’t know about it. You can try it out right now.
Press Ctrl-Alt-Down Arrow on your keyboard.
It would be nice if you fix their computer for them afterword, but who am I to tell you what to do?
Thanks for reading.