{"id":39,"date":"2020-04-03T20:55:05","date_gmt":"2020-04-03T20:55:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/?p=39"},"modified":"2020-04-06T12:27:11","modified_gmt":"2020-04-06T12:27:11","slug":"the-cow-pie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/2020\/04\/03\/the-cow-pie\/","title":{"rendered":"The Cow Pie"},"content":{"rendered":"

Tony was the Night Baker on the submarine.\u00a0 He loved his job.\u00a0 By passing out warm pastries to the mid-watch crew, he never had to buy a beer when the boat was in port.\u00a0 It was also a good job because the Chief seldom came in at night to see what he was doing.<\/span><\/p>\n

One night, after finishing the sticky buns for breakfast, Tony had a leftover piece of dough.\u00a0 From past experience, Tony knew that throwing it in the trash would cause problems.\u00a0 When the yeast fermented, the dough would become too large.\u00a0 Tony did what many other bakers do.\u00a0 He placed the leftover dough in a pie tin and put it in the oven to “kill” the yeast.\u00a0 He turned the oven off.<\/span><\/p>\n

After finishing his galley clean up, Tony went out to the mess for a cup of coffee.\u00a0 He enjoyed the late night BS sessions with other crew members.\u00a0 He completely forgot about the leftover sweet dough.<\/span><\/p>\n

After a couple of hours exchanging sea stories, he went back in the galley.\u00a0 He retrieved the pie tin from the oven.\u00a0 Due to some unintended chemical reactions, the dough had created an unusual shape.\u00a0 It looked exactly like something a farmer would find in the pasture.\u00a0 The cooling oven and the rising yeast made the pile of dough look like a pie: a cow pie.\u00a0 It was a rather smallish thing and looked like it might have been human excrement.<\/span><\/p>\n

Not wanting to waste a great art creation, Tony waited until morning.\u00a0 He placed the fake cow pie in his buddy Joe’s rack.\u00a0 When Joe returned to his bunk, he was astonished and angered.\u00a0 Why would anyone do such a thing when the head was nearby.\u00a0 He put on a pair of gloves and started to clean up the mess.\u00a0 When he discovered it wasn’t real, he did what any good sub sailor would do.\u00a0 The pie soon found a new home in a different rack.<\/span><\/p>\n

For the next few days, the poop creation made the rounds.\u00a0 Finally, some brave sailor put in the Chief Of the Boat’s bunk.\u00a0\u00a0 The COB dutifully passed it on.\u00a0 For some strange reason, after the cow pie appeared in the XO’s bed, it disappeared forever.<\/span><\/p>\n

Foot Note: over the years, Tony tried to replicate the strange piece of dough.\u00a0 He was never successful.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tony was the Night Baker on the submarine.\u00a0 He loved his job.\u00a0 By passing out warm pastries to the mid-watch crew, he never had to buy a beer when the boat was in port.\u00a0 It was also a good job because the Chief seldom came in at night to see what he was doing. One … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “The Cow Pie”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[4,3],"class_list":["post-39","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-food","tag-submarines"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=39"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":51,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39\/revisions\/51"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=39"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=39"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tinys-bs.com\/seastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=39"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}