Q. What do goblins and
ghosts drink when they are hot and thirsty on Halloween?
A. Ghoul-aid.
Q. What is a Mummies'
favorite type of music?
A. Wrap.
Q. Why do demons and
ghouls hang out together?
A. Because demons are a ghouls best friend!
Q. What's a monsters
favorite bean?
A. A human bean.
Q. Why can't the boy
ghost have babies?
A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
Q. What do you call a
witch who lives at the beach?
A. A sand-witch.
Q. Where does a ghost go
on Saturday night?
A. Anywhere where he can boo-gie.
Q. What do ghosts say
when something is really neat?
A. Ghoul.
Q. Why did the ghost go
into the bar?
A. For the Boos.
Q. Why did the game
warden arrest the ghost?
A. He didn't have a haunting license.
Q. Why didn't the
skeleton dance at the party?
A. He had no body to dance with.
Q. Where does Count
Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A. At the casketeria.
Q. What happens when a
ghost gets lost in the fog?
A. He is mist.
Q. Where did the goblin
throw the football?
A. Over the ghoul line.
Q. Why is a ghost such a
messy eater?
A. Because he is always a goblin.
Q. What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
A. A toasty ghosty.
Q. What tops off a
ghost's ice cream sundae?
A. Whipped scream.
Q. What do you give a
skeleton for valentine's day?
A. Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.
Q. What is a vampires
favorite holiday?
A. Fangsgiving
Q. What kind of makeup do
ghosts wear?
A. mas-scare-a.
Q. Who was the most
famous ghost detective?
A. Sherlock Moans.
Q. Who was the most
famous witch detective?
A. Warlock Holmes
Q. Who was the most
famous skeleton detective?
A. Sherlock Bones.
Q. Who was the most
famous French skeleton?
A. Napoleon bone-apart
Q. Which building does
Dracula visit in New York?
A. The Vampire State Building.
Q. Where do most
werewolves live?
A. In howllywood, California
Q. Where do most goblins
live?
A. in North and South Scarolina
Q. Where does a ghost
refuel his Porsche?
A. At a ghastly station
Q. What do you call a
little monsters parents
A. Mummy and deady
Q. What do you get when
you cross a black cat with a lemon.
A. A sour-puss
Q. How do you scare a
mummy
A. With a yummy dummy in a crash test crummy
Q. What do you get when
you cross a vampire with the internet?
A. A blood-thirsty hacker baby
Q. Why do ghosts shiver
and moan?
A. It's drafty under that sheet
Q: Why didn't the
skeleton cross the road?
A: He had no guts
Q. Why do vampires scare
people?
A. They are bored to death!
Q. How do you know that a
vampire likes baseball?
A. Every night he turns into a bat
Q. What's it like to be
kissed by a vampire?
A. It's a pain in the neck
Q. How can you tell when
a vampire has been in a bakery?
A. All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts
Q. What songs does
Dracula hate?
A. "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders"
Q. How does a girl
vampire flirt?
A. She bats her eyes.
Q. What's it called when
a vampire has trouble with his house?
A. A grave problem.
Q. Why doesn't anybody
like Dracula?
A. He has a bat temper.
Q. Why are vampires like
false teeth?
A. They come out at night.
Q. Why did Dracula take
cold medicine?
A. To stop his coffin.
Q. Why does Dracula wear
patent leather shoes?
A. Sandals don't look good with his tuxedo.
Q. How do you keep a
monster from biting his nails?
A. Give him screws.
Q. What can't you give
the headless horseman?
A. A headache.
Q. Why did the headless
horseman go into business?
A. He wanted to get ahead in life.
Q. What kind of tie does
a ghost wear to a formal party?
A. A boo-tie.
Q. What's a ghosts
favorite desert?
A. Boo-berry pie.
Q. Why do girl ghosts go
on diets?
A. So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Q. When does a ghost have
breakfast?
A. In the moaning.
Q. What do ghosts drink
at breakfast?
A. Coffee with scream and sugar.
Q. Where does a ghost go
on vacation?
A. Mali-boo.
Q. What do they teach in
witching school?
A. Spelling.
Q. Why does a witch ride
a broom?
A. Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.
Q. What do you call a
witch's garage?
A. A broom closet.
Q. What do you call two
witches living together?
A. Broommates.
Q. Why don't mummies take
vacations?
A. They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.