Thoughts From a Clicker
By Tiny Ruisch
Back in the last century, I had a nifty little electronic gadget on my key ring. It did only one thing. If you pushed the button, it would indicate if there was a wireless network in range. Back then, most networks weren’t secure and it was easy to get online. Electronic gadgets have come a long way since then. Many people have their favorite gadget, everything from a remote control to a robot that vacuums the floor. Even the military has gadgets they use to blow up things. In my opinion, many of them are useless. There are many new technologies others have that I just don’t care about.
By now I bet you’ve figured out that this article is going to be about some high-tech devices that I can live without.
The cell phone might be one of the most annoying gadgets ever. I got my first cell phone in 2005 when I first moved to Louisiana. My daughter added the wife and me to her family plan and gave us both a phone. Even people that can’t live without a cell phone would have to admit that they are often annoying beyond human endurance. The photos and movies they take can lead to all kinds of problems. They can be awful scary. When driving, you have to watch out for the cell phone packing motorist. When carrying one, you have to worry about being tracked. When using one, you have to worry about the controversial possibility that the thing is slowly cooking your brain. There isn’t a whole lot of privacy any more. Don’t you just love it when you’re at a meeting and someone’s cell phone rings? After all of the ranting, I have to tell you that I’ve put myself in a position where I can’t live without the darn thing. If an incoming call is not in my contacts list, it goes straight to my voice mail. I don’t need to sign up for the National No Call Registry. If I don’t know who is calling, I just don’t answer the thing. A while back, I received an e-mail that closed, “Sent from my mobile phone. Please excuse any typos.” As Colonel Potter often said on MASH, “Horse hockey!”. (Once he changed it to “Cow cookies”). I’m sorry, but I am not buying in to the notion that I should forgive poor grammar, bad spelling, or indecipherable texting because the sender is using a gadget with a lousy keyboard.
You don’t see electronic pagers much anymore. The last time I saw one, I was at a restaurant. They paged you when it was your turn to give them some of your money. Talk about making you feel important. “Dr. Tiny, we have your table prepared with some surgical instruments. Please come to the check in counter. We’re finished testing your patience level. Don’t forget to return our useless gadget.”
Speaking of useless gadgets, how effective can a battery powered robot that automatically vacuums the floor be? Can that Roomba do a good job as small as it is? Maybe if you got one of those robot doggies, you could use your Roomba as a robot doggie pooper scooper.
I’m still undecided whether or not I like dedicated e-readers. My tablet has e-book software that works pretty good for me. The advantages that I miss out on are being able to read in bright sunlight and a much longer battery life. Since I am seldom out of the shade for very long and I’ve got plenty of electric outlets, I’m not too worried. I don’t have a dedicated e-reader, but with my tablet I can not only read a book, but write one, listen to the radio and play a game or two.
If I could take a poll of all the club members, I wonder how many would have a useless gadget in the junk drawer next to a key chain camera or a clapper. That’s it for this month. I’ve got to finish searching the internet for a new gadget. I’ve been looking for a Swiss Army Knife with USB and Bluetooth capabilities. I want one that will tell me if I need to sharpen the tools. I sure hope I can find one that is upgradeable.
Thanks for reading and keep on clicking.